


The Diary of Ines

by comeonlight



Category: Final Fantasy Type-0
Genre: AU, Brother-Sister Relationships, Diary/Journal, F/F, Male-Female Friendship, Post-Tempus Finis, Tags Are Hard, What are titles, gay science, some Kurasame/Kazusa but it's more or less background, some l'Cie angst I guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 05:57:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5573386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/comeonlight/pseuds/comeonlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tempus Finis had nearly destroyed Orience, yet survivors remain to pick up the pieces and start rebuilding. Colonel Faith is one of those survivors, and he's searching for a friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Diary of Ines

**Author's Note:**

> This is trash. Have fun.

Faith sat at his desk, frowning at the book before him. On the cover was a familiar name: “Ines Belfarre.” He’d been searching for her in hopes of assisting in the reconstruction effort more effectively. The woman was heavily involved in the project, as well as ambitious and brilliant, so surely she could have directed him to do something more than scout for any stranded survivors of the horror that was Tempus Finis. By this time, anyone stranded should’ve been found or dead anyway. Faith scanned the first page of the book and sighed. “That’s so like you.” It was a diary. Under normal circumstances, reading it would be a complete invasion of privacy, but no one had seen Ines for weeks. That, and the diary had been delivered directly to him. With his expression darkening further, Faith opened to the first page.

_The Steelworks isn’t quite as sucky as I thought it’d be. The coffee is decent, and there are a couple of cheery people for whatever reason. They’re probably just stupid, but I won’t rain on their parade. I will admit, though, some of that Magitek is rather impressive. Only some. A lot of ideas for a bunch of these MAs seem nice, but the designs are horrendous. Wasting so many materials, and not even looking good doing it! Oh, well. Maybe that’s why they hired me: to fix this shit show. Not a problem._

_Damn, promotion already. I’m not complaining, though. I get to work with people a little less incompetent. And, a raise of course. They’re giving me a little more creative freedom, which I like. That blueprint I submitted is on its way for production approval. It’s gonna be a bummer fixing all those malfunctioning machines tonight, though. Damn manufacturing defects._

_Marshal Aulstyne’s been making a lot of visits. He’s come to Steelworks 4 at least three times in the last month and a half. I feel like something’s about to happen…_

_Woah. Talk about mind-blowing. As of today, I’m officially working under the l’Cie Qun’mi. Honestly, she seems pretty intimidating. That’s to be expected of a l’Cie, I guess. But I also noticed her being quite sarcastic. I like it. She’s a recent l’Cie, so there’s bound to be some or maybe even more than some humanity left in her. I think we’ll get along._

_She’s beautiful. Wow. I can’t fathom why she wears that mask all the time. Damn. She’s got a really gorgeous face. I’m glad I got assigned to her team. Otherwise I may’ve never gotten to see what she looks like. Such mesmerizing eyes and soft lips, I want to touch her skin because it looks so smooth and…I’m being so weird._

_Damn it. I spaced out today. I never do that. But some sort of vague memory I can’t even grasp was in the back of my head, gnawing at me. I felt like I was going to be sick. And then Mistress Qun’mi snapped me out of it. She looked a little angry at first, but then she looked…worried? She felt my forehead and asked if I was okay. I said I was, but she made me take the rest of the day off anyway. I feel bad about it._

_I apologized for yesterday. Mistress Qun’mi told me not to be so hard on myself. She said she knows I’m doing my best and demanding more than that won’t change anything. I’m getting to really like working with her. Sometimes we end up alone and talk shit about our superiors. I made her laugh. I really like the sound of it. Ha, if she keeps this up I might fall in love with her._

_On a really dumb whim, I invited Mistress Qun’mi to spend her lunch break with me. L’Cie don’t need to eat, but she still deserves the break time. She deserves it more than any of us. She works so hard, and she works so well. Finally, someone who knows what they’re doing. Anyway, she said yes. I was shocked and had this weird anxiety, but I was really happy._

_I got a glimpse of Blackburn. Pretty fine machine. Faith had better take care of that bad boy._

The frown on Faith’s face eased just slightly, but he was nowhere close to a smile. He resumed reading.

_What the hell, Ines? I seriously could’ve gotten myself fired…or worse. I’m not even sure why it happened. I saw Mistress Qun’mi hard at work with that cold restless look in her eyes and I just hugged her. From behind. She didn’t even react, just kept on working. She could’ve fired my ass, even killed me! But she didn’t. Does she just not care? Is this what the Crystal does?_

_Mistress Qun’mi…thanked me? She said she needed the hug. It made her feel “human,” in her words. Truthfully, she is human to me. I’m worried about her._

_I can’t even half remember what happened. We were working in the lab, and then we started talking, and then it got deep and then she kissed me. All I really remember is how good it felt, and how she looked at me afterward. That wasn’t the look of an emotionless l’Cie. That was the look of a human being._

_I don’t know how people would react if they found out a l’Cie is in a relationship with a human, a subordinate at that. If anyone would even believe it. Either way, it’s best to keep this under wraps._

_We push our minds to the limits together, whether it be science or sassy comebacks. We play games to test our wit and keep ourselves sharp, like a contest between our brains, but each time, we’re both winners. I make her smile and laugh and feel like an actual person – or at least I think I do – as much as I possibly can. But I can still feel the Crystal slowly pulling her away from me._

_I’ll be headed off on my own mission soon, but I’m more concerned about Mistress Qun’mi. Invading the dominion’s capital…sure, she has the jammer, but I just don’t feel good about this. She told me not to worry. She swore she’d come back safe. She told me to focus on what I have to do, and I will, but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop thinking about her. I couldn’t if I wanted to. I just hope everything goes well._

_The mission failed. I don’t understand. I don’t understand anything. I can accept that we couldn’t take control of the Vermilion Bird Crystal, but I can’t piece together why Mistress Qun’mi would take full responsibility. It wasn’t her fault. It was the team. Is it a pride thing? Or is she just looking out for the rest of us? It doesn’t make any sense. I feel so…I don’t know what I feel. She said that it was her decision to lead the offense on Lorica, to sacrifice herself. Of course I had to respect that. It doesn’t mean I didn’t bawl my eyes out though. She smiled at me before she left. I know it was fake. I know what her real smile looks like. That wasn’t it. Everything feels so far away. Almost like a nightmare. Mistress Qun’mi said my memories of her would be gone when this is all over. I don’t want to forget her. I don’t think I ever could. But at the same time, I hope that she’s right. I don’t know how to deal with this pain._

_I’m so confused. Why would she tell me that she loves me? Why would she kiss me like that? Why would she make love to me and make me feel beautiful in every way, and at the same time tell me not to miss her? How could she ever expect me to forget her? I can still feel her skin. I can still taste her lips. I can still hear her voice. This hurts. This hurts so much. But I have to respect her wish. “Be strong. And if you can’t do that, fake it ‘til you make it.” I guess that’s my only option now, huh?_

_“Captain.” This title doesn’t feel right. The real captain is still alive. Mistress Qun’mi hasn’t come back, but I still remember her. That can only mean that she’s turned to crystal. It suits her. Strong, beautiful, and priceless. Honestly I feel pretty broken right now. All I have left of her is my memories…and “Captain.” Even if it hurts, I have to get to work. Showing weakness won’t earn me any sympathy, and I don’t want any either. Especially not after Faith caught a glimpse of my breakdown. Pathetic, Ines. Get yourself together._

“So that was it,” Faith murmured. He recalled being sent to find Ines, as she hadn’t reported for duty that day. He was on standby, so he didn’t mind completing the simple task. Ines had been in her room, staring at a wall. He was ready to scold her until he noticed the bloody nose and…those eyes. Empty, cold eyes with tears silently flowing from them. Ines turned and gave Faith a blank stare, until he left.  
Only minutes later, Faith returned and closed the door to Ines’ room. He sat beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder. “I reported that you’ve fallen ill.” Ines didn’t respond. Faith sat with her in silence for a minute before speaking again. “The l’Cie…was your friend?” Ines rested her head in Faith’s lap, much to his surprise, but he quickly adjusted to the situation. “Mistress Qun’mi is my friend.” A tear fell onto Faith’s lap. “No, more than that. So much more than…”  
Faith sighed to himself. Even now, he had yet to experience the pain of losing a loved one. Well, losing a loved one and remembering them. After that day, though, he’d kept an eye out for Ines as much as he could. He’d developed some strange urge to protect her, almost like a younger sister. Perhaps there was someone that he’d wanted to protect in the past but couldn’t, and they were forgotten…  
With another sigh, Faith flipped to the next page of the diary. There was a noticeable jump in time, and he knew exactly why. The day after she’d “fallen ill,” Ines returned to work. During a discussion about Engine 9, the topic of Class Zero came up, and Faith had mentioned that they were responsible for preventing the Empire from taking Rubrum’s capital. Even now, the guilt still lingered. “I should’ve known.” But Faith didn’t know. He didn’t know that Ines would immediately devote all her time and resources to the single goal of eliminating Class Zero, or, as he’d called them until recently, “the Red Demons.”  
The battle resulted in the loss of Ines’ left leg, and her right arm was severely damaged as well. It was her own genius and the assistance of medical personnel that enabled her to use it again. She received a number of burns and scars, but perhaps what most upset her was the fact that she had to have the side of her head shaved. Sure, she managed to pull off something stylish, but it wasn’t quite…her.  
It really did hurt to see Ines like that. Faith remembered the defeated look and sheer sadness in her eyes. All the anger seemed to be gone, and if there was any left it was probably directed at herself. She didn’t write in her diary, because it was still probably locked in her room. Even if she had been able to write in it, it was unlikely that she wanted to at the time. Eventually, though, she picked it up again, not writing as frequently, but still writing.

_I look like a damn android. At least I can hide the leg well enough. As soon as I get used to these prosthetics, that is… I wonder what will become of us. We’re losing this war. If Faith makes it back alive, I have to thank him for being there for me. Like the big brother I never had. It seems I don’t have so much luck with family, though, according to what the records say. There are a lot of things I regret right now, and one of those is not showing my appreciation enough. I’ve had a million chances, what with him visiting all the damn time. But I guess the end’s really coming now, and I should tell him if I even get another opportunity. He’s a fighter, that guy. I have to admire that. Anything for his comrades. …It feels strange writing in this thing again. Not a bad type of strange but, I don’t know. I wonder what Mistress Qun’mi would say about the stitches in my arm, or more importantly the wires. Maybe she’d give me a hug, or even better, laugh in my face. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to hear her laugh again._

_There was so much blood. So much blood, everywhere. I still have nightmares about it. That was it. That was Tempus Finis. Yet, I’m still alive. A good number of people are still alive…but so many more are dead. I looked through all the papers. There are so many names I should recognize but don’t. General Qator, Sergeant Major Charon, I know for a fact that I worked with them but I can’t remember their faces or voices for the life of me. I guess that’s what happens when people die in this world. In war. In hell. The Red Demons are nothing compared to the Rursus._

_I’ve heard rumors that people have started to remember the dead. Stories from all over of the injured passing but those around them remembering. If that’s the case, then I’d better try contacting everyone I remember…that’s not a lot of people._

Not long after that entry was written, Faith received a letter from Ines stating that she was in Rubrum, researching. He sent a letter in return telling her that he was safe and that he’d help in any way he could with the reconstruction effort. That was pretty much the extent of their exchanges. They focused on working to repair Orience in their own ways. That wasn’t all Ines was up to, however.

_Kazusa and I are making pretty good progress with what little resources we have. Crops are flourishing and being distributed throughout Orience. Mid-sized Carriers are delivering food and supplies to farer places, like some cities in what were formerly Milites and Concordia. Any deliveries to towns that were originally dominion territory are made using chocobos. Refugees from this region are slowly making their way to Akademeia. It’s probably best to have them all here where there are the most resources. If a disease were to break out, though, that would be bad. The survivors who can use magic have reported that it’s weaker than before Finis. In addition to that, I’ve noticed a drop in the performance of all Magitek. I suspect that the Crystals are losing their power, in which case we’ll have to find new sources of energy and methods to go about daily life. It’s a big adjustment for sure, but one that might be necessary._

_Kazusa is…quirky, but he has some good ideas. He also lost a loved one to the war, and he seems just about as determined as I am to bring that person back. Not back to life – that’s impossible, scientifically; with an eroded corpse, there’s nothing we can do. But to regain memories might be possible. He told me he plead again and again with the Vermilion Bird Crystal, but all he got was silence. That’s to be expected. He’s no l’Cie and the Crystals are weakening. Even if it can’t bring this “Kurasame” back to life, though, maybe it could restore memories. It’d be cruel not to. Kazusa’s working so hard. In fact he’s one of the only researchers making any real breakthroughs. When I see him, sometimes I see myself. It’s good to have a friend here._

_It looks like I’ve done what I can here. All of my notes, all of my research: it’s all in the Crystarium now. I hope it’ll be of good use. Emina and Kazusa will keep each other company. I had no idea a former Imperial spy would’ve come all the way back here, just to be with her friend. I respect that. The Vermilion Bird Crystal returned their memories. Kazusa had been crying for a bit when Emina showed up out the blue and took over the job of comforting him. She also looked like she knew the pain of having lost her beloved. I’ve really, really seen too much in this life._

_Old Lorica. I’ve decided I’m going there. I need to see her, just once. It’s been eating away at me ever since I fought the Red Demons. My failure. Trying to hide it only made it worse. I’m supposed to be confident, unstoppable. I designed my own damn prosthetics, survived Tempus Finis, and boosted the reconstruction effort, but I’m still so disappointed with myself. I couldn’t save her. I couldn’t avenge her. Even her legacy…in the end, we still lost. I need to apologize. Then maybe I’ll be at peace. Maybe the voice in my head telling me I need to see her will finally be silent. Everything, silent. And I’ll just sleep forever.  
Faith stood up. “Ines, what are you…?” He flipped through blank pages, looking for any other writings, until he came upon the very last two pages of the book._

_Dear Faith,_  
Thank you for everything. You never had to comfort me that day, or visit me while I was recovering from my injuries. You never once were required to look out for me, but you did. That means more to me than you’ll ever know. Please, take care. I know there are wonderful things in store for you. Keep moving forward, Colonel. Good luck – not that you’ll need it. You have…. okay, I won’t make the pun. But it’s true. Your future is bright.  
Love,  
Ines

Quickly, Faith moved his eyes to the final page.

_My Dearest Mistress Qun’mi,_  
If you should happen to read this one day, by chance or by fate, I ask that you forgive me. A life with only memories of you was eating away at me. It became unbearable. My love for you is endless, but my strength is not. I’ve contributed what I could to this world, and I hope your eyes see a beautiful, peaceful one full of life and joy. I want you to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted from you. Please, as a final request, I ask that you smile. Smile and be free, and make friends. Be at peace, after all your struggles. That’s my wish. You have my support, always. You know that. I can never tell you enough, but, I love you. You’re my everything. So please, take care of yourself and find joy. Thank you for being in my life.  
Eternal Love and Best Wishes,  
Ines

“Ines.” Faith clenched his teeth and began walking. “Sir, are you going scouting again?” a man asked. Faith gave a flat, “No,” and continued onward to the MA he’d been using to search for survivors. He wasn’t going scouting. He was going to find a friend. Even with a weakened Crystal, the machine could and would fly to Old Lorica.  
Faith flew to his destination hastily and debarked his craft. He saw the glimmer of a crystal and rushed toward it, the sight coming more and more into focus as he approached. He stopped suddenly upon seeing a dagger on the ground. “No, no, Ines, no…” He looked up to Qun’mi’s crystal and lost his breath, startled at what he saw and the fact that he hadn’t realized it sooner. A second l’Cie had crystallized.   
Ines’ arms were embracing Qun’mi’s legs, and a few crystallized tears were on the ground by her feet. Her face seemed peaceful enough, though, and Faith’s worry vanished. “The Crystal made a l’Cie of her, and she didn’t even notice. How weak must it be now? And what was her Focus? Simply to find Qun’mi…Is this the Will of the Crystal, or a miracle?” He sat on the ground. “So, this is how it feels to lose someone.” Faith wasn’t particularly sad in that moment, though. In fact, he was elated that these two women had their chance to be together again. The loss would hit him hard later, he knew, but for now, he smiled. “I’m happy for you. Both of you. I’ll make sure that you awaken to a beautiful Orience. You have my word.”


End file.
